Plainsong

Small Steps ~ Skills Cards for Kids

Elizabeth is hosting "Small Steps Toward Virtue"

Tomorrow starts Lent, again. I look forward to starting fresh on the path to holiness.

Small steps. . .

Toward my goals. My goals are centered around Christ.

My favorite part of this week was our new "skills cards." These are little 3"x 5" cards with each child's name on one. Beneath their name is a list of everything academic I expect of them for the rest of the school year. I simply sat down and looked at where we had come this year and where I still wanted to be.

For some kids, that means they would have no more of a certain subject. For example, my 12 year old is above and beyond what he needs in history. He needs to use his time on another subject now. Since he pursues so much history on his own, I am using my time with him in other areas. 

Skills cards are my new spring favorite. These last months of school will target trouble spots, get kids over certain stumbling blocks they may have, and be a constant reminder of what I am trying to accomplish.

Here are a few excerpts from our skills cards:

~5 year old- zipping boot camp and learn to tie his shoes!! He is so reluctant to zip or tie, but its time to make a game of it and get him over that hill.

~7 year old- get through her readers this spring to move her on to more interesting reading for the summer. Most importantly she will prepare for First Holy Communion.

~9 year old- he only has long division left in his math book before it's completed. We will focus on math facts as well. Spruce up on the mysteries of the Rosary and New Testament stories

~12 year old-get ready for the big catechism bee, Anatomy, finish up geometry then on to fractions for the rest of the year. Learn how to take a timed math test. Write paragraphs. Diagram on a white board, together on the couch before moving on to diagramming on paper. We have done lots of diagramming so far, but a white board seems like a perfect way to erase mistakes and move on without frustration.

~14 year old- write a research paper, keep up his classes he is taking outside the home but really evaluate procrastination. He is getting all A's but we both know, Sunday night schooling is for the birds. Let's see where the time is being lost during the week, get some good habits going before he faces high school head on next year.

All these things and more are on their "skills cards" in checklist format. I'm enjoying so much crossing off skills as they happen. The trick is to keep it realistic.

A "skills card". . .one small step in virtue for me, keeping my mind on what God has called me to do here in my home. It's all part of being Diligent.

 

 

 

Goals for Homemaking

Homemaking is an art.

I want so much to become better at this important skill of transforming a dwelling into a lovely, inviting home for those who reside within those walls and for those who come to visit.  I have a long way to go.

But alas, Lent is coming and with it comes in the invitation for reform. I have chosen four areas of my life to focus on improving and one of those is diligence in homemaking.

Goals for the material aspect of making a home. All this is thrown out the window if there is not love first of all. . . (not in order of importance)-

~Sheets that are fresh and clean, and replaced on beds every other week.

~Beds should have clean, unripped comforters/quilts with pleasant decor fitting for the person.

~Towels should be fluffy and free of tears. Space should be set aside where towels can be hung to dry after a bath/shower.

~Bedrooms that are empty of clothes, toys, and clutter making the clean and restful.

~Meals that are healthy, good-tasting, and planned ahead of time.

~Living areas that are inviting, orderly, and tidy, not to mention pleasant to the eye in decor.

~A kitchen that functions, is clean, and well stocked.

~Bathrooms with fresh linens and frequently sanitized and plenty of the necessary toileries.

~Bedrooms and play areas that can welcome friends. This is a separate category than a welcoming home for adults. The home should welcome children as well.

~Areas set up for prayer, study, work, and play.

~Functioning systems for dealing with laundry, dishes, chores, and pets.

~Natural light should be welcomed into every room flood our daily activities. Windows should be clean. When the season permits, fresh air should replace central air with open windows if possible. Its not always sensible here with our wind, humidity, cold, etc.

~At least once a week or more the children should smell something baked in my kitchen and enjoy slow moments of savoring these morsels together.

~Dishes should be free of chips and pleasing to the eye, even daily ones.

~The table should be set for dinner and something should be placed as a centerpiece, whether it's fresh flower or a nice dish.

Now, after saying all that, I admit I have much room for improvement.

Diligence for Lent

diligent adj · 1 quietly and steadily persevering especially in detail or exactness; "a diligent (or patient) worker"; "with persevering (or patient) industry she ...

diligent–adjective 1. constant in effort to accomplish something; attentive and persistent in doing anything

diligent- adjective. persevering and careful in work; industrious; done with careful, steady effort; painstaking

And so we must be in our efforts in homemaking as wives and mothers. This is my Lenten effort. . .to be more diligent in my home.

I'm going to be writing about it here on Plainsong. Let's encourage each other.

This is Not Heaven on Earth ~ Preparing for Lent

I have been thinking about what I would like to work on for Lent this year.

A part of me wants to conquer my faults and come out on the other end of Lent a brand new perfect person. I want to completely triumph over bad habits, defects of my temperment, or problem areas in my life. I wish that were a reality. On a postive note, I am going to act as such, that I can truly be transformed with our Lord's help, and come out of Lent a better person.

That is one of my biggest problems. . .wanting instant perfection. I am an "all or nothing" thinker. If it is not done right, then it's ALL wrong. If life is not running smoothly, or I make a mistake, everything is wrong. All or nothing thinking creeps up on many of us and is so damaging. 

How many times have we tried to give up something for Lent or even for life, only to have us make a mistake and throw the whole improvement idea out the window? We tell ourselves, that we tried to give up chocoloate for Lent but gave up, or even we tried to give up impatience with our children but it didn't work. It didn't work. That is a very finite statement.

This Lent, may I see the times I conclude that I failed or that life failed me, when that is not at all reality. It's such a sneaky thought distortion.  "All or nothing" thinking masks itself in many ways. It keeps you from seeing the small successes, it keeps you from wanting to forge on through the difficulties of life, of homeschooling, of parenting, of homemaking, or whatever your vocation may be. Furthermore, it is really a way of looking at yourself and this life as possibilty being perfect. It is expecting perfection where there never can be. It is wanting Heaven on earth and it is not at all how God wants us to view things.

Fianlly my main three areas I will focus on this Lent are:

~Faith

~Love

~Diligence (I will explain this in a future post. Stay tuned for a Mom's online "meeting" with Diligence in Our Homes this Lent. I will be hosting)

~Joy

I will pick something from each of these areas each day to work on. . .and if I miss a day, I will try again the next day, not conclude I failed. I will accept everything I did as progress.  When I fall, and I will fall, I will not lie there and cry. I will get back up and try again.

And after this Lent, I will see that I became better not perfect.

 

Woven through Time

I have a serious weakness for old fabrics, textiles, and the handiwork of bygone days.

Therefore, I have a nice collection of antique German linen towels, a vintage quilt from my Grandmother (maybe 3o's/40's), and other items I enjoy.

Over then next weeks, I hope to photograph some and comment on them.

I just got in the mail a "lot" of German vintage and antique towels to add to my collection. I actually jumped up and down before I opened the box, I was so excited. I have purchased from this nice lady last year so I know she has credible items. In the box were lovely damasks, homespun, and basic woven linen towels. And they all have hand-embroidered monograms. They date from the turn of the century to the 20's. Also, included were items the have never been used.

Let me explain more about why items have never been used. Around the turn of the century and beyond, women collected these treasures and stored them away in hope chests, cupboards, etc. Some of these treasures still have the blue ink under the monogram indicating they have never been washed from the day they were monogrammed. Some items have two monograms that were done by different people, in different thread. How intriguing! Was this a daughter's intials after her mother used the towel? Was it given to a friend who then left her mark?

Isn't it fun to think why they never used these towels? Most of the unused items are the damasks. Don't you suppose it was because they thought they were too lovely and expensive to use? They were waiting for that one day when a special guest came, to pass to a daughter or that special moment when these beautiful items would be displayed.

That day never came.

Here is what I have to say to these German farming homemakers. . .

Well, dear souls, who kept these beautifully woven cloths, made from lovely flax. I will use them, display them, and be grateful for your care of them. Time and again I will run my fingers over your initials, turn over your handiwork and see the knots you made. Who are you, what was your name, what hopes and dreams did you or did someone have for you, when those initials were carved out in this space? May you rest in peace.

I'm in the process of laundering these linens. I cannot wait until the sun shines strong enough for me to hang them on the line. Then, I will spritz them with lavender spray and iron them, fold them. . .and use them.

A little picture. . .(I promise more- wait until you see these German damasks! Germans knew how to make linen. Wow!) This picture is not too impressive. I will take better ones. . .soon.

 

Just Because. . .

 

Today looks like this. . .

I decided to make these. . .

 

Pumpkin cupcakes with sour cream frosting. I googled pumpkin cupcakes and ended up with Martha Stewart's.

I made up my own frosting of butter, sour cream, vanilla, powdered sugar.

They were awesome and very messy. I had to use a fork!

Small Steps Toward Virtue

Despite colds, frigid temperatures, and disorganization that is bothering me these days, we are doing quite well.

Here are a few small steps toward virtue. . .

• The older boys are making a Holy Hour as I type this. Their father took them on his lunch hour, I'm grateful for a church so very close to our house. We live in the country but the Catholic Church is 4 minutes away and being rebuilt on a hill about 60 seconds away. Thank You God, for that amazing gift.
• We are plugging away at our schoolwork. My children know they must do it despite the fact that Mom is attending to the baby. That has been hard here this year. . .a year that has been a challenge to our homeschooling routine with a baby who has had frequent colds and who wants mom to hold him 24/7. My back aches from holding him so much, but life is still good. At least we have him. . .I often say to him, within earshot of the children so they will never forget that we very much welcomed all these children into our lives, "You were a good idea!! You are God's idea and we think you are so good!" I never want my kids to be sorry there were lots of children in our home, even the ones that make so much noise and chaos. The older ones do get frustrated with a fussy baby. They do think his crying grates on their nerves. That's normal. A fussy baby is hard, but I need to make sure they understand it never detracts from the person and that he is just as welcome in our home as a crying baby as he is a happy one. Its unconditional love. They seem to understand it and love him no matter what. They love him so much.
• Is it stepping forward in virtue if you decide to make major changes in your laundry system. . .sure it is!!!!! Afterall, we are clothing the naked =) I'm off to Target tonight to pick up some large laundry baskets. I am tired beyond belief of the clean laundry everywhere in my bedroom. Since I have a baby I cannot put down for long and who only wants mom, I am going to corral that clean laundry into large laundry baskets instead of kidding myself that I can dump it on my bed and get to it later. Only to have nightfall come on with a vengence and me clear that pile of clean laundry off my bed and onto the chair, spilling onto the floor. It is so disheartening and discouraging. I want my bedroom to be a relaxing haven. I already have a system set up for the kids' clean clothes that works great but the parental laundry that comes upstairs to be put away os not going to great. So, for now. . .its a new laundry basket holding zone until I have my hands free again.
• love collecting eggs

 

 

Simple Thoughts

It was one of those nights where the baby wakes and wakes and wakes. His nose was stuffy yet again.

Didn't we do this just last week?

This little boy has been sick 9 times in over 7 months. He will be 8 months old next week. I don't think I have had a good nights sleep in nearly 15 years.

As I make my way to the kitchen for a bowl of cereal, baby in arms, I feel like a truck hit me. I am so incredibly tired this morning. I realize a huge part of that tired feeling is me opening the door and letting in all sorts of thoughts of defeat. I know when those thoughts enter my mind and I begin to agree with them that we are all in trouble.

I'm a recovering pessimist.

I'm not sure if I was born that way or just became one,  but I am definitely a pessimist. Thankfully, there is so much out there these days on how to help your thought processes become more empowering and positive.

I'm too tired right now to go get my postivie thinking books to get accurate quotes so I am merely going to write off the top of my head. But from what I can remember from Martin Seligman is that the main difference between pessimists and optimists is that. . .

1. Pessimists think a setback in their life is somehow their fault and part of their core self while optimists see it as unfortuate but separate from who they are as a person. So, with my sick baby I could easily say to myself, "If I were a better mother who ate better then maybe I would have a higher quality milk and my baby would not be sick. I'm such a bad mother." The optimist might say, "Darn. Another cold. Well, he had lots of exposure with all his siblings and the fun things we do. At least it's not a serious cold. He is smiling and active and has always fought these mild colds very well. I'm going to try to be better at eating/vitamins and see if our overall health improves. But, of course it's not my fault. Kids get sick all the time. That's life."
2. A pessimist sees a setback in life, not as an isolated event, but as something that effects all aspects of his life. The optimist sees it for what it is, simply an isolated event. So, using my example of the baby being sick the pessimist might think, "We are always getting sick. I can never keep to a routine. I'm a homeschooling failure since my house is a mess and the laundry is back up. I'm seriously going to consider enrolling my kids in school." The optimist might think, "This has been a tough year for us to keep to our usual style of homeschooling. Oh well. There are different season of homeschooling, I suppose. This year we have loved having a new baby in the house and that has been beneficial in and of itself. Afterall, we are a family first of all. Anyway, we have had a new reader learn to read, and many other academic successes despite our interrupted routine, so it hasn't really changed anything at all. Isn't it amazing how adpative and reslient kids are? Next year we will be back to our same old routine, but for now I am going to enjoy the baby time since it's so short and forgive myself for not having as creative year as I would have liked to have. We are still academically succesful, even if it's a little dry.  We have still been able to do all the same fun things we always do for hobbies, anyway."
3. Pessimists see a setback as permanent. Optimists see it as a temporary problem. "I never sleep, the baby is always sick, I struggle with keeping just the basics up in the house. How will I ever do this for all these upcoming years? (permanent)" The optimist says, "This is just a hard winter with colds. Boy, we were much healthier last year. I remember a couple years ago we went through something similar when Joseph was a baby. Glad spring and summer will blow in here soon. We always seem to have those long stretches of health. Having a new baby in the house, although a short time, can sure take a lot out of a mother. But it's so short and before you know it they are all grown up. I can do this. I will remember the joy and the hardships won't seem like as big of a deal as it does now. I'm going to encourage young mothers who are feeling overwhelmed and remind them how fleeting the hard times are. I know its true as I have a teenager now and can see the big picture.

I'm glad I took the time to switch gears this morning. I can do this.

Hobbies for Moms

Well, my little propane crisis is over and was far easier to repair than I realized. So, I completely overreacted and we are back on track.

Anyway, I'm glad now that I did paint. Sometimes a mother just has to stray from the usual tasks and go for accomplishing something she has been meaning to do for a long time. Although, if you have little ones, I would not recommend doing it frequently or you will crash and burn.

This all ties into something I have been wanting to write about for some time. People who have hobbies tend to be happier people in general. I think that is because they are busy doing something enjoyable, rather than sitting and ruminating about life's negative drawbacks.

Try to find a hobby you enjoy, that does not consume your time, that does not drain you, and that is compatible with your lifestyle. What do you enjoy? What are your interests? Is there something you could pursue that your kids could also enjoy beside you? Afterall, a hobby is not meant to be merely an escape from your children, but rather a means of recreation.

Finally, let's share our hobbies. I will be later with an idea to get moms to share their hobbies and encourage others to get started on something. . .

 

Breaking the Routine

I don't want to make it sound as though I have our family on a tight schedule, but I do think we have a routine of sorts.

I often would like to add more structure to our routine and am going to try to strive for that coming up. Maybe I will write about that another time because this brief post is going to be about breaking away from your routine every once in a while.

This weekend I decided to paint. As many of you know, when the mother is the only bolt that holds things together and she decides to stray from the daily tasks at hand, everything comes loose.

The room I painted it needed it badly as we are coming onto homeschooling in high school next year. This space is was an unused bedroom in the basement that we have turned into a workout spot. So, I really needed to attend to that project before all the outside chores for spring and summer begin.

My goal in writing this was to encourage mothers every once in a while to stray from the regular routine and do something creative. However, this morning I find myself with a messy house and our family out of propane. When the temperature dips below 22, our heat pump stops working. Tonight we are going to be 5 degrees, so that means no heat. We also have no hot water.

So, I painted over the weekend and now we have a disaster, although a minor disaster. There are worse things in life than no heat, no hot water, mountains of backed up laundry, and a messy house.

I will be back to write about hobbies, as I was hoping to address on this blog soon. As of this morning, I'm not sure I would encourage moms to stray from their routines. I think I cahnged my mind. Maybe later I will laugh this whole thing off and be glad I painted.

Well, off to bundle everyone up. At least we have electricity so we can run space heaters, boil water, and run the oven.

 I'm not even sure this post made much sense.